Lessons Learned

Day three after amputation was awful.  Hudson became more alert as his pain meds began to taper off.  The whining increased in volume and he couldn’t seem to get comfortable.  He wanted to lay on the air mattress…no, the orthopedic memory foam pillow…no, the couch…no, the six foot cushion…wait, the air mattress…and so on.  Back and forth all day.  He’s still on restricted activity, so I had to lift him onto and off the couch, as well as grab his sling and help him get to his next location.  He also wanted to go outside constantly.  He didn’t need to go potty; in fact he only went once all day.  He just wanted to stand on the deck and smell the fresh air.  Hudson tires quickly though, and would want to lie down.  I didn’t want him lying on the deck, I was worried dirt might get into his sutures, so I drug out his pet cot and memory foam pillow.  He sunned himself for a short time on his bed, before I drug him into the shade.  (I was concerned that he might get sunburned where he was shaved for surgery.)

 I sat at the outdoor table and got some work done, while Hudson snoozed and my other babies laid in the sun.  We had a nice 20 minutes of quiet before Hudson felt the need to lick his stitches.  He’s typically responsive to the command “Hudson, no lick,” but alas, not today.  As soon as I put the cone of shame on him, he wanted to go back inside.

There, we continued our wonderful game of up, down, in, out.  In addition to the frustration of not being able to get Hudson settled, I couldn’t leave the room without him trying to follow.  We have two bathrooms, both reached by a set of stairs.  I literally could not go to the bathroom without Hudson trying to follow me.  He fell on the stairs on his first attempt while I was in the bathroom.  I rushed out and inspected the sutures, but there didn’t appear to be any damage.  Clearly, using the bathroom wasn’t to be.  I had to wait until Tony came home at lunch.  I now feel sorry for all the times I was at work and thought to myself “The dogs can wait another hour for me to come home and let them out.  I just need to finish this.”  Having been on the waiting end, it sucks.

Hudson fell a second time on a portion of the wood floor.  I went into the garage to grab a diet Pepsi out of our garage fridge.  I figured since it would only take a second, it’d be fine.  I figured wrong.  Hudson got up and made it all the way to the garage door where his rear foot slipped and he went down.  I had the door propped open, so I watched, unable to help, as he fell.  He let out a loud yelp, and I was sure he’d torn a few stiches.  Luckily, that wasn’t the case, but I learned my lesson.  I must stay in Hudson’s line of vision.

I can't explain in words the sheer mental and physical exhaustion I was feeling.  The whining and whimpering continued through out the day, and I couldn't escape it.  I knew that wasn't Hudson's fault, but I was getting so irritated that I almost yelled at him to stop.  There was many a time when I lay next to him on the mattress nose to nose and begged him to please stop.  I knew it wasn't logical as I was doing it, but I just couldn't take it anymore.  I couldn't leave the room, so the only outlet I had was standing in a corner of kitchen, facing away from the dogs, humming loudly with my eyes shut.  I felt like screaming, but that would only upset my pack.  After a few minutes, I had calmed down enough to return to laying on the air mattress.

One thing I've been learning over the last few days is to take naps as they come.  I got 2-3 hours of sleep during night one, and four during night two.  During the day, Hudson seems to whimper and cry in intervals.  An hour of crying, thirty minutes of silence, then another hour of crying.  I've learned to work during his crying and settle down for a nap in the silence.  When the whimpering begins again, it's back to work.  Obviously, this makes my work hours somewhat erratic, but I make sure everything gets done by starting early (Hudson gets me up between 4 and 6) and working late. 

Tony typically gets home at 5, so we have started to follow a pattern.  I go to the bathroom the moment he arrives while he keeps Hudson company.  He then sits on the deck with a beer to decompress for 20 minutes, after which he comes inside and makes himself something to eat.  All the while, I'm working on my laptop.  Once he's done with dinner, I sign off and he sits with the dogs while I take a shower.  (Ahhh…I love showering.  I honestly believe you could call showering a hobby of mine. J) 

Tonight I came upstairs after taking a shower to find that Tony had fallen asleep with Hudson on the air mattress.  Awhhhh.

We switched off sitting with the dogs the rest of the night, so each of us had some time to ourselves.  This may sound silly, but after only two days staying home with Hudson, a half an hour to myself with no dogs felt wonderful